And she's off

This morning was a complete 180 from what the past few days have been. Ariel was more than ready to go to school. That was a relief. She woke up, took her shower, ate her breakfast, played her dog's life game, then off to school we went. She looked so darn cute & big with her bookbag. I didnt get many pics.. there werent any other camera happy parents in there so I didnt want to embarrass her... but you can bet I'll get lots when she gets home! Here are the ones I got:

So proud and ready to go! This was right before we left the driveway.

And here is little miss in her classroom. Gosh she's cute! lol.

No tears were shed.. no freak outs... nothing. She was content as can be giving me & her sisters a hug & kiss & then going back to her thing. What a relief!

Clarity, however, did have a bit of a time once we left and got back in the van. "mama Air Air is not in her seat". I explained that Ariel was staying at school & we would see her this afternoon. With that tears came to Clarity's eyes, her arms crossed, and she looks down and says, "I miss my Air Air". I had to distract her or I was going to cry! She hasn't been easy since we've been home. She's bored. And whiney! Hopefully she'll get used to this adjustment soon or I may just go bald from pulling my hair out! I think she needs a nap.

Anyhow all went great getting Ariel to school. I can't wait to go pick her up & hear all about her day!

It's Flying By

naturally the last day with my pumpkin home all day... is going by in a flash. Soon it will be her bedtime. I swear I'm not going to get any sleep tonight. She's nervous, I'm nervous for her. I just keep hoping once we get there her nervousness will turn to excitment & she'll be a-okay having me leave. If she tears up, I'll have to be strong.. I can't show her that I'm nervous or that I just want to keep her home after all.. but I'm sure if it happens, I'll be having a major meltdown as soon as I make it to the van. I just keep telling her she's going to have so much fun that she won't have time to miss me. She'll be making new friends, making me things, & she'll have a ton to talk about when she gets home. And that I can't wait to hear all about it. Tomorrow Ariel will be my little kindergartener. I still can't believe it when I say it.

The girls & I ran to Burger King, had a quick lunch, then took off to walmart to grab a few things. I got miss Emmalyn a pink, princess walker. Now I know the pediatricians say it's best not to use them.. but right now, they can bite it. lol. We don't have stairs & she will always be supervised. I just have to have something to put this baby in where she can follow me around & play at the same time. She hates for me to be out of sight. Kind of hard when I have an entire house to clean kiddo. Maybe now, I can get things done without her hollering about being neglected. lol. The poor, pitiful baby. She cracks me up though... she's too darn cute. she's got this thing with sticking her tongue out.. all the time. And we definately have a mobile one on our hands... you can lay her in the floor and she is on the other side of the room in no time with her rolls & scoots. She's still not sitting up by herself.. she can but she slumps over rather quickly. It's okay.. I'm so not rushing anything. She's going to be in Ariel's shoes and starting her first day of Kindy before I know it!

oh lol I am going on a cruise to Nassau! Yeah I'm so sure! My phone rang and it was some automated man saying if I just answered a 10 question survery, I would recieve two all inclusive cruise boarding passes. Eh, why not? I'm sure there is some catch or some scam... but it only took three minutes so I did it. A cruise director or something is supposed to call me in 72 hours... I would so laugh if this were legit. A girl can dream!

Rain, Rain, Much Needed Rain!

I guess these are the remains of Fay coming down... and I am sooo glad! We have been so dry... and needed this badly for a while! Just as I'm sitting here typing up praises of this rain.. I check the weather bug. My stomach is in knots when I see the county Jesse is working in is under a tornado warning. It says very strong rotation has been associated with the storm and to take shelter now. I think I nearly threw up. I ran to the phone & called and he says it's okay looking where he's at but he heard the sirens going off & that they are about to hit the road to come home. Lord please just let him make it home safe, please! I couldnt believe they were out driving while tornado sirens were sounding. ugh. I could kill him! I'll wait until he gets through this door safe & sound though! As much as that man can drive me crazy, I'd be absolutely lost without him.

We took the girls out for a bit of fun during Jesse's three day weekend (he had Monday off cause his boss was in Virginia). We took them putt putt golfing in Maggie Valley on Sunday and then to the rec. center swimming yesterday. Both were quite an adventure. Emmalyn was good as gold during the golfing... just hung out in her carrier & watched us play. Thank God cause miss Clarity Grace was a MONSTER! She would run all over the green as one of us was trying to play, or go grab the golf ball after we had putted, or jump around and run ahead to the other holes... gah. We tried letting her play but she would rather roll the ball like a bowling ball towards the hole than to use a putter... so we let her play... her way. We got through it.. but it was a bit of a challenge. A funny one though!

The swimming looked fun. I sat in a chair holding Emmalyn while Jesse & the girls swam. They pretty much stayed in the big kiddie area (I think the deepest it got was 2 feet). Before we went I ran into Kmart and found a pair of floaties for Ariel, a swimming vest for Clarity, and the cutest inflatable boat for Emma Girl (even though she didnt use it.. it was on clearance and I figured we may use it later!). The girls had a blast. It was too funny though...Jesse was on one side of the pool letting Ariel and Clarity play. Well Clarity was in like one foot of water but since she had her vest on she was floating and I guess didn't realize she could just stand up. She spies Jesse on the other side and panic hits. she's trying to doggie paddle to him and ends up doing these rolls in the pool. Poor baby, I could tell she was freaking out and thinking she was going to drown. So Jesse rushes over to "save" her and helps her realize all she had to do was put her feet down and she could stand up. LOL. I was rolling. Next summer we definitely need to look into getting swimming lessons for the girls. I pray we're in a better place financially by then & we can do that. We can only pray!

Jesse's on the hunt for another job. This one treats him good and all but there's just a couple of issues we both have. 1. With him being out of town and having to leave so early on the mornings he is home, It's going to be hard if I go to work (and we are at that point where I HAVE to) working out care for the girls. 2. His boss Jeff is planning on moving an hour further away soon so Jesse wouldnt be able to catch a ride and an hour and a half trip to work one way... is so not going to happen. 3. Jesse hates this out of town stuff. He misses the girls & the girls miss him. Shoot.. I miss him. He's going to stay with this until he finds something else. But please say prayers that we both find something great that works for us soon. We need all the thoughts & prayers & good vibes we can get!

Miss Ariel starts school on Thursday. one more day left with my baby home... *sniff*. The anxiety for her is starting to set in. She'll break down into tears out of nowhere and say that she's really going to miss me when she goes. This is different for her & she's scared. I pray it all goes well for her. I also pray she doesnt cry when I take her in. If she does, I'm going to have a heck of a time keeping myself together!

Now that

I posted my little reflective post, it's time for me to post something upbeat & funny. I'm not sure how that's going to play out yet, though. Surely I have something zany or witty to say. Or then.. maybe not!

ooh I got it! However even though I sit here & giggle about it... you may not. It may just be one of those "you had to be there" things. I'm not sure. Anyhow.. on with the story...

Last night Jesse did his usual goodnight call (sucks to only get to talk to him for a few minutes once a day!). well he talked to me, then Ariel, then Clarity. Well as Clarity was saying her I love you, sweet dreams stuff... she stops & before she says goodbye tells her daddy he needs to talk to Emmalyn. So I get the phone and ask him if he wants me to put it up to her ear and of course he would never say no to that. So I do & I hear him start talking to her. Her head jerks over and looks at me with these huge eyes and her mouth wide open. Her face was priceless... like "what is going on?!". It isn't two seconds before she realizes, "hey that's my daddy". she had been quiet as a mouse the whole time me & the girls were on the phone... in fact she was drifting off to sleep. Not anymore! She started smiling and making all these noises.. kicking her feet.. squealing. I couldnt stop laughing! It took me a good while to settle her back down after we hung up.

Jesse is coming home this afternoon. He told me it may be early too.. so woohoo!! The girls & I have missed him lots this week. We'll be so glad when he comes through that door!

So I was on myspace

and I went & checked in on Steven Curtis Chapman's page. Somehow doing this made me go to his website and I can't believe it's been 3 months since his daughter, Maria, was killed. Even more of a reminder about how fast life passes by. I would have thought it has only been a couple of weeks. I'm sure it feels like an eternity for them, though. I'll be keeping them in my prayers, for sure.

It's hard not to get wrapped up in everyday life... housework, cooking, errands... but this is a reminder to me that everyday is a gift. I thank God for my babies and for all the time he's blessed me with them. I pray I have many, many more years & years with them but I'm going to do my best to love them and hug them and kiss them as if I won't.

Isn't it beautiful? Thank you Kristy!!

I could not ask for more

She cracks me up!

Nancy.. some of her blog entries are just gold. She had one up about commercials and what is hilarious (to me anyways) is the exact commercial that she wrote about (an eharmony one where the husband and wife look related)... I've had the same thoughts as I was watching it! Then I read her comments and Misty hit on another one of the other commericals that just gets on my nerves.. the lovely time in a bottle allergy medication one. Now what bothers me about that one is the girl says "They should put that in the ingredients... 2 hours you didnt have before". That just really gets on my nerves because an ingredient is something that makes up the medication. You having more time is not a part of it. That's more along the lines of the purpose section not the ingredients. But that's just my thinking. lol. So yeah I got a good laugh last night reading the musings of these girls. Cause they are so right on! And though I have never seen the fruit arrangement commercial nancy talked about... I sure had a giggle!

Isnt it Ironic?

How when you pay a company they can take that money right out of your bank account... but when you cancel... it takes forever to get that money back. I had to cancel the whole charter internet/phone deal. Another tech showed up unexpectedly today and he said he couldn't do it because he couldn't ground the cables. Whatever. I'm so over this. lol. So I just called and I will be getting a full refund, however they issue a check and it takes three weeks. Why can't they just put the money they took out right back in? Oh well. Charter sucks. Now I know. I did place an order for AT&T to come out and do the phone and internet thing. We will see how that goes. I'm not paying a penny in advance. Lesson learned.

Ariel's teacher & her assistant came over for the home visit today. They are both so sweet and I think this home visit thing is an awesome idea. Ariel is looking forward to going to school and is more at ease. I got my questions answered and I'm feeling better myself. She starts school August 28th.

Jesse is MIA this week. He left this morning & won't be coming home until Friday evening. I started missing him last night knowing he was leaving this morning. He misses us.. we miss him. It's not too bad when he only has to spend a couple of nights.. but when it's nearly a week.. I realize he does more around here than I give him credit for!

Visitation Night

Well we visited Ariel's classroom this afternoon... and honestly I dont know how she's going to find it! I'll have to ask her teacher this when she comes over for the home visit tomorrow. The school is pretty big and the kindergarten/first grade wing is way in the back. But I'm sure Emiley will walk Ariel to her class since they will be just a few doors down from eachother. That makes me feel better. Hopefully Ariel isn't as geographically challenged as her mother! Ariel flip flops on how she feels about going to school. Some days she's excited & can't wait... others she says she'll miss me and she's not ready. She'll be fine. I'm worried about ME. Where have the past five and a half years gone?! I still can't believe next week I'll have a kindergartener. Seems so surreal.

I am fuming with Charter..which is who I am scheduled to get my phone and internet with tomorrow. My installation date was Aug. 19th between 5-7 pm. About 20 minutes before we leave to go to Ariel's open house... a charter tech pulls up. He says he's here to hook up my phone. I asked if he was here to do the internet too and that they didnt even tell me he was coming.. that I wasnt scheduled for anything until tomorrow & they were supposed to do both. He said his work order only had him scheduled for doing the phone and that if he did the phone and another tech did the internet, I'd have to pay two installation charges. Um. no. I already paid them $110 and haven't gotten anything installed yet! So he calls his dispatch and explains the situation.. that I'm leaving & I was supposed to have everything done tomorrow... and they tell him my account is now on hold. So who knows when I'll get it. I love how my installation date is on hold when it hasn't even gotten here yet. I sent them an email stating how unhappy I am. I hope to hear back! ugh! Aggrivating.

Well I better get to work cleaning and getting ready for that home visit with Ms. Wilson tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes! Oh you know that office I've been saying for months that I needed to organize? It's clean! I spent ALL day on it yesterday. Shredding papers, unpacking boxes, clearing the 'catch all' room out. I can't believe it's done. And NO help from my husband. Well I guess he did help.. he kept the kids out of my hair & let me get it done.. my way. And I got a massage as a thank you for doing it alone.. soooo... he redeemed himself. lol.

Still no word

from Walmart but I'm assuming since I signed papers & got sent out for a drug test... I'm hired. My drug test didnt get sent away until Monday.. so I'm going to call Walmart by next Monday if I hadnt heard from them by then.

Jesse is in Spartanburg until Saturday evening. I hate having him gone. I hate even more that I am *ahem* jealous... Did I just say that? I believe I did! They are great to him.. I'm glad. They pay for him to eat out... he gets put up in a Marriot (because the boss' sister works for them.. he gets the guys great rooms). Jesse gets to soak it up kid free in a jacuzzi. He says he gets so homesick though and misses the girls like crazy. I believe him. I can't go a day without my girls even though some days I feel a trip to a padded room would be enough to make me happy! lol. But we miss him.. lots & lots!

I'm going to feed the girls some dinner & then I might go over and see Lisa and Stevie. She had the baby today at 2:57 pm. He weighed... 10 lbs 8 oz!! Big Boy!! But all is well and I'm looking foward to meeting him. I'll post more in a bit.. dinner is cooking.

The poor girls

all have colds. Clarity started having a runny nose and stuff the night before last, Ariel started yesterday morning, and miss emmalyn... she woke up with it. Yuck. Colds during the summer.. boo! My throat feels a little off but so far so good.

I got a call last night from the Hampton Inn wanting me to go in for a second interview.. which during my first one the manager said if I got that I was pretty much hired.. but I'm not going. I had an interview at walmart friday and they are waiting on my drug test (which I know I passed). They are going to start me in the old store which maybe takes me eight minutes to get there and move me to the new store when it opens oct. 1st (which is literally 2 miles from me). So woohoo! I'll be working third shift so I shouldnt have to find a sitter for the girls and they are starting me only a dollar less than the hotel so walmart is the way I'm going. While I would have loved the $29 at any HIlton owned hotel perk... I would have been spending close to $100 a week in gas and then another $100 a week easy on a sitter.. so... doesnt make much sense! I'm just glad God brought something even better through for me.

Jesse said he was sooo homesick leaving from Wednesday until Friday. But get this. They put him up in a sweet Marriot hotel (his boss' sister works for the Marriot so she gets the nice perk and lets Jeff put the guys up cheap). Jesse got to relax in a hot tub, watch the new Indiana Jones movie on pay per view, his boss treated him to Outback Steakhouse and other great dinners & breakfast. Suuuurrree you were homesick! lmao. No I know he misses us like crazy. I guess rooming with guys just isnt as nice as being in this hectic house with your wife & kiddos. Jesse did bring me home the shampoo, conditioner & lotion the hotel provided. He knows I love Bath & Body Works so when he saw that's what the hotel used.. he brought it back for me. aww. Gotta love him.

Well Emma girl is fussing. I think she has a present for me. lol. I'll try to get on here more and update. I've really been slacking badly in my blog. I hate that.

Nerves!

So today I got for a job interview at the Hampton Inn in Biltmore Square in Asheville. I am so blessed nervous.. it's been 2004 since I've last had an interview and that was a casual Pizza Hut interview where Darryl didn't honestly care what I had to say... I guess I had the look of a waitress... he started me the next day. lmao. If only I could get that lucky tonight. But I have a feeling they have a lot of interviews lined up so I'm going to have to stand out somehow. I havent wanted something this bad in a while. I did make a boo boo and told them I wanted the 3 pm - 11 pm shift. I've since changed my mind. I'll take the 7 am- 3 pm one. I thought about it and with 3-11 I'd be going to work before Ariel got home from school and coming home way after bedtime. That's not gonna fly. I gotta see my babies! So I'm thinking I'll see if Patrick wants to stay here and keep Clarity during the day.. she loves him.. and I think he can handle her. And I'll pay someone to keep Emmalyn. That's a nerve wracking thing right there. I'm trying to find someone close to the hotel... just in case. Maybe things will fall into place. I pray so. I HAVE to help start bringing in an income. My time at home is long past over. So we'll see. I went to walmart and bought a dress and a cute pair of shoes for the interview. Did I mention how nervous I am?!

I guess we shall see what God has in store for us. Jesse is out of town.. spending the night in Spartanburg. I was fine with this yesterday. Thought "whatever"... but for some reason as me & the girls were out shopping for my interview outfit.. it hit me and I wanted to bawl. I miss him. More than I thought. I dont know how military wives do it. I'd be a downright mess.

My parents bless their hearts are driving all the way back over.. even though they just left yesterday.. so I can go to this interview. Makes me want it even more. I will be totally bummed if I dont get it and they wasted time & gas & energy. I'll be totally bummed anyways.. but that would add to it!

I not D.D!!

I admit as much as I love my girls.. sometimes I get great joy over aggrivating the crap out of them! I know that's mean.. but they do it to me... so we're even. Just a few minutes ago I was singing a song called "I know a girl named D.D". For those of you who don't know the story behind D.D that's just the initials for dirt dobber. It's something Jesse called her the other day when she was filthy and needed a bath. So I'm singing my song and Claire is getting madder by the second. "stttoopp! Dont sing that song! I not D.D! I'm ity" I really should stop. Do I? No. lol. "ooohhh stttooopp! I not D.D!!" I stop because I can see this might possibly lead to a meltdown if I don't. She huffs away " I not talking to zhu" The way she says "you" cracks me up. It has like a z sound at the beginning. cute. So yeah I'm done irritating my baby. Pretty sad that was like the most fun I've had all day. I need to get out more.

Emmalyn had to get her shots today. awww. She did excellent. I mean yeah she cried.. but as soon as I scooped her up all was fine in Emma land. The whole waiting game getting back there was not fun. Our appointment was at 1:55. I was warned that they were short handed and the wait would be a while. So we wait. And wait. and wait some more. Finally I ask someone what time it was. When she said it was going on 4 pm I got up and politely asked the receptionist if there was a guesstimate time for us getting back there. Appearently we had been forgotten because within like a minute we were back there. They were slammed.. it was so busy.. and being short handed never helps. I wish I had asked before I waited that long though... Ariel & Clarity were bored to tears & hard to keep happy. But once we got back there we were in & out. Wham bam thank you m'aam. Miss Emmalyn is as happy as can be sitting here "talking" to me while I'm on the computer. You wouldnt know she had her shots. so yay!

Mom, dad & Patrick came over and have gone back home. My dad has an MRI scheduled for September 3rd I believe so if you all could say some prayers, we'd appreciate it. I wish it was sooner.. that seems so far away! Hopefully they'll be coming back for a visit before then though. The girls miss them lots after they leave.

Just an update

so today.. what happened today? Oh yeah we went job hunting. I put in an application at that home health care place. I felt like I was applying to work for the CIA or FBI or something. It was pages long and if you get an interview I think they fingerprint you and everything else. I'm clean. I think. lmao. No I am. Seriously. So anyways maybe I'll hear something back. I sure hope so!

Jesse talked to Ray tonight (a guy he was working with that doesnt do the granite just remodeling and stuff) & he said that Pat came and got his lowes card back from him so Ray thinks he'll be let go as well. So Ray said if he hears of any work, he'll call Jesse and Jesse said the same. It's sad a company can do this to people.. little or no warning. But whatever. I told Jesse I'm glad he's out of there. Jesse just doesnt know how they could be so nice and then this happen. I guess they're just crazy! lol.

So our agenda tomorrow... get out and hand out avon brochures and see if some salon will do the raffle thing for me (I have the gift).. I'm just trying to get some contact info for potential customers. Jesse is going to keep on the job hunt and we're also hitting art galleries in waynesville about Jesse's fountain. It just so happens tomorrow is Art after Dark (it's the first Friday in each month) and all the galleries are open until 9 and they have live demonstrations of art, food & all that stuff.. so maybe just maybe Jesse can be in that tomorrow evening. That would be awesome!

We'll see what happens. That's all we can do :o)

oh mom Jesse called that guy back and all he was asking about was how to get some of the plumbers putty from around his strainers. lol. I guess he called Biltmore and they gave him your phone number since it was an emergency contact? I dunno. Jesse didnt ask how he got your number but that was weird! It wasnt important or a bad call.

To my awesome girlies!!!

It is amazing the friends I have made from this one message board. They are honestly & truly some of the most awesome girls ever. I am thankful for them. Sometimes they are my lifeline. When I'm feeling guilty about getting on to the girls or I've made what I think is the worst mistake a parent can make... they are the ones to tell me "I've been there". They are also there to pray for me or lift me up when something like what we're dealing with right now is going on. Yesterday I checked my mail and I had gotten my wool diaper shorties from Sarah. That was something that totally made me smile... not only did the girl crochet me these things... she made Emmalyn a pair of mary janes. I so need to get a pic cause everything is so freaking precious! Sarah is the same girl that made up my pregnancy announcements. She has so much talent! So Sarah thank you!!

and to the rest of you that are always there to tell me funny stories about your lives or kiddos, to offer me words of support or encouragement, to let me vent or cry or be a bitch & you still love me anyways...

YOU ALL ROCK!!!!

He has his reasons

Sometimes I wish I knew what they were. I know God has a plan. I know things happen for a reason... but the human side of me just wants to scream, "What is it?!" at times. I'll get into this in a minute.

My parents came over for a couple of days. I'm glad. I miss seeing them. I know the girls do too (Clarity cried & cried for her Abu after they left). After they left I felt in a funk. I guess because of my dad having to be referred to a neurologist and worrying about that, plus the other stuff going on & just wishing my parents could stay... I was just down & out. Jesse gets home and he's looking down & out as well. I ask him if he had a bad day and he takes a deep breath & blows it out. Then tells me he wont be going back. huh?! Appearently they felt the need to fire EVERYBODY. It wasn't just Jesse. That was the icing on the cake for me. I burst into tears and cried & cried & cried. Pat (the shop partner) told Jesse he didnt want it to end this way but he has a partner and the partner wanted to clean house and start all over. I think something is up big time. I'm not sure what. They did pay Jesse for all that he worked so that will help but I hate being in the "what does the future hold?" boat. I hardly slept at all last night.. just kept praying. I know God has something in store. I know he'll take care of us. It's just the waiting and being patient part I dont like. So anyways Jesse is looking for something else. Bummer. He'll find something and he'll find it soon. He always does. But this so SUCKS that they did this to him. I got a call on my phone today (it's still not working but I can check my messages using Jesse's cell). It was the lady that Jesse installed the countertops for, did plumbing work for, did tile work for (they didnt finish yesterday). It was the lady that adored the kids and was just wonderful to us when we went for Jesse to do the plumbing last Sunday. She was wondering if I knew where Jesse was because no one had shown up to finish her tile work. So I call her from Jesse's phone and tell her what happened. She was HOT ! She was like "You have got to be kidding me! I have told them over and over how wonderful Jesse is. How they are lucky to have such a polite guy working for them and how he does everything he can to please you". She told me that when she sees Pat she's really going to lay into him over that. She just couldnt understand. Anyways no one showed up to do her tile work. I told her to go about her day and do whatever she had to do... not to wait for them. She said she had been waiting all morning and she had things to do. She said she tried calling their showroom & it's closed. Fishy fishy fishy. Something is so not right. Maybe the fact that Jesse's out of there is a GOOD thing. The lady told me she will be keeping us in her prayers and she will definately be staying in touch with me... she wants us to bring the girls back. They loved it at her house and didnt want to leave! lol. They are grandparents and all of their children and grandchildren live far away so it was a blessing to her to play "nana". I just wish I could see Pat's face when she gets on to him about how they did things with Jesse! lol.

I am applying for a home health care place in the morning. They said CNA is not required and they are hiring for all shifts and you can choose your hours. So prayers being sent up that I get an interview and get hired! Well I just wanted to post a little update.

Mom.. dont worry about us. We'll be fine. I know it's a mom thing to worry but don't! :o) I'm actually feeling optimistic today and not totally worried and stressed like last night. God has his reasons.

How do they know

how to have you completely wrapped around their little fingers? Miss Emmalyn.. 5 months old.. and already such a con! She ALWAYS wants to be held. That's not good. I admit I have done this. I have spoiled her rotten. She's my last.. what can I say? Dont mind that I did this with the other two as well. I guess I'm just a sucker. Anyhow I need to find her a walker or exersaucer or something to put her down in. She associates her swing with sleep. Therefore when I put her in it.. she whines to get out. Today she was almost asleep.. I wouldnt let her see me cause I knew if she did it would be over. Well at that moment I spotted a fly on my screen door on the inside. It had to be let out.. I had to pass in front of her... darn! I open the screen and get the fly out and turn around to see these wide blue eyes just beaming at me. Then comes the huge wide open mouth smile. Then the little feet kicks. I talk softly to her and tell her to go night night. WHATEVER! Yeah right. She just smiled & kicked some more. How could I not pick her up? So yeah.. not much has gotten done today. Amazing how I had the house clean yesterday & today it looks as if a hurricane hit it. Until I get this kid something to occupy herself.. I'm going to be in this same boat. Giving in. Picking her up. Holding her. I'm such a sap!

It's been a while

I am having to FORCE myself to make a blog entry. So unlike me. My blog is usually so fun for me. I love having these memories recorded to read back over, but for the past week.. I've just not been myself. I think I may have a bit of depression kicking in & I think I'm figuring out why. Ariel starts school in about a month. I am going to miss her like crazy. Just thinking about my day without her.. tears start filling my eyes. I'm not ready. I know, Im probably being a huge baby but I can't help it. She is my big helper. She is there to make silly jokes, sing silly songs, & make me smile. She is also there to drive me crazy and smart mouth.. which I admit... I might miss! It's just going to be a huge adjustment & I have anxiety about that. I also dont know how Clarity is going to deal. Clarity & Ariel, though they have their moments when they drive eachother totally crazy, are honestly the best of friends. Clarity is going to be lost and I'm not sure how I'm going to entertain her as well as Ariel does. ugh I'm hoping this is like what I usually do. I think worst case scenario and then when it happens.. I'm like "what was I so worried about?". I pray it's like that.

Here's a quickie recap of importance since I blogged last:
*Jesse got a new job that pays well and he loves. That's wonderful! Nice to see your husband come home happy :o)
* I got a new cell phone (well it was used. A palm treo) off ebay. I LOVED the thing. Yes, I said "loved". It lasted two days. Nice. So now I have another phone coming. One that isnt so much like a computer & wont have program issues. I asked my friend April why the cell phone god is peeing on me. She said she doesnt know but she hopes they stop soon. Me too, girl, me too!
* the girls are wonderful. Precious as always. I dont know if I have ever mentioned in this blog.. HOW MUCH I LOVE THEM. lol. They are my heart. So is my husband even though yesterday I could have kicked his butt to the moon! It was just one of those days... we were both in grouch mode. He irritated the crap out of me and I did the same to him. Funny how you can have days like that.. then today is completely opposite where I miss him and can't wait for him to come home. lol.
*I visited a friend's blog and became sad with her today. She's not having anymore children and she visited a site that told her this time last year she was 5 weeks pregnant. Well this time last year I was 11 weeks. I'm not having anymore kids either. To be honest it's not the pregnancy I miss.. I hated that... but I am sad that Emmalyn (shoot.. all 3 of them) are growing at rates of speed that can't be human. Why can't they just stay little for a little longer?

Okay I'm going to clean the office now. That should kick my depression in the butt. Either that or it's going to overwhelm me and make me more depressed. lol. Well here I go.

Cute Little Sprout!

I'm so silly!

Cuddling with her new blankie! Thank you aunties!!

Are you talking about me?!

I got my peekablock!

uh oh! Daddy's gonna get me!

Look at those blue eyes!!